In order to discuss this topic, we need to take a little
bit of time to establish that we are on the same page.
From the moment we have been born we have an innate knowing
inside us about sex.
The fact that this is still dormant inside us doesn't mean
it doesn't exist.
Life is a journey and everything will be presented to us at
the right timing.
When the farmer plants his crop, it needs nurturing and
caring, so that the seedling can develop into its full
glory.
It is important to know that from the moment we have been
conceived, the thoughts, emotions and feelings our mother
has around the topic sex, are being 'transmitted' into the
foetus.
And a lot of people in the age group of 60 and beyond have
been brought up with a sense of shame around the topic sex.
It was a 'forbidden' zone and depending on where you were
located on the planet it was also being projected as
something that was dirty.
Sex was an aspect of the duties you had to perform when in
a marriage.
These projections and others will inhibit the enhancement
and joy around a sexual experience.
These projections and the shame do undermine your Self
Esteem.
Let's talk a bit more about this important issue of Self
Esteem.
After all it will be a major contributing factor towards
the issue on HOW to enhance the joy of sex beyond 60.
Seeking Self Esteem allows you to exist. Seeking Love
allows you to transform.
In order to transform you have to exist. The problem arises
when you look for the Self Esteem out there instead of
inside yourself.
This is the way it has been taught to you.
To give you an example: You do not decide if you are a good
child, that's up to the father and mother.
You do not decide if you are a good student, that's up to
the teachers. And so on.
IT'S IS NEVER UP TO YOURSELF.
So over time you reinforce the message to yourself that you
cannot trust yourself, but you can trust others!
Trust mother, she knows what is best for you.
Trust your teachers, they are teaching you the right things.
Trust the newspapers otherwise they wouldn't have printed
it.
Your Ego wants to stay out of the limelight.
The Ego is opting for outside validation. So you are always
searching out there in order to feel yourself good.
Outside validations are not bad, not wrong. The problem
arises when you use this outside validation as the source
for your SELF ESTEEM.
Some try to be perfect. A lot of people have an issue with
growing older.
They look into the mirror and they observe a wrinkle here
and there, and they observe some extra layers of fat, or
they are too skinny.
Let's run to the plastic surgeon. And see if they can fix
me and let me keep on looking as if I am 25.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to look and even
requesting some help from a plastic surgeon. However the
problem arises when we start to feed the negative ego.
Then we want to be perfect.
The results of this perfectionism are:
- Low creativity
- Low trust levels
- High guilt
Or the opposite is created such as using age as an excuse
that it is all over and it doesn't matter anymore.
Would this process contribute towards enhancement the joy
of sex beyond 60?
Then there is another topic which is important to realize.
When you choose to enhance your sex life, it is also
important that your physical chemistry is in balance.
We have sexual bodies and, more importantly, have a nervous
system that concentrates nerve endings in our genitals
(twice as many for females).
Society should have no shame or fear of experiencing the
joy of sex.
Especially at an age when we are applying desire to
practise and may be accustomed to sex, and what that
experience is for us individually.
It is normal to feel various degrees of fear and shame
about our sexuality because of the many ways society views
it.
Sexuality is essentially our individual perceptions of our
experience to sensual pleasure.
Allowing yourself to experience a heightened awareness to
your sexual experience through your senses and hence
through your nervous system, and then processing that
through your brain allows you the ability to create the
sexual experience that you desire.
Essentially you have the ability to turn yourself on or off
once you learn to channel your sexual energies!
Nature can teach a lot about the beauty and the natural
regeneration process. When we can accept the beauty of
having a joyous sexual experience and allow the feelings to
unfold, then this sexual experience is also regeneration
for our level of energy and sense of well being we can
produce.
How to enhance the joy of sex beyond 60 is a mixture of
feeling good emotional, mental, spiritual and physical.
Depending on the personal situation you are in. You can be
with a partner, or not. When for one or another reason it
wouldn't be possible to have the traditional sexual
intercourse, then you can choose to be the explorer.
The choice is yours.
----------------------------------------------------
Helena Ederveen, Clinical Nutritionist, Master Practitioner
Neuro Linguistic Programming; Advanced Eriksonian Hypnosis;
Health and LifeStyle Coaching
http://www.a-holistic-healthcoach-approach.com
http://www.apneasleep-snoringtreatments.com
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