Adults with ADD are not "wired" for details. We're
creative-types, entrepreneurs, inventors, idea generators,
and big picture thinkers.
When an adult with ADD is confronted with too many details
to tend to, overwhelm quickly sets in. This is not a
character flaw - it's quite simply just not what we're
wired for.
There is actually a simple solution for dealing with
details, and it might surprise you: don't deal with them.
A truly successful adult with ADD knows how to delegate the
details, in both the personal and professional realms. But
many ADDers struggle with delegation. When coaching
clients to delegate the details (projects, tasks, and
chores) that overwhelm them, there are three common
objections that I hear.
Objection #1: Cost
A client has an online business that has a loyal customer
base. He sells a lot of merchandise, and has been doing
all the order processing by himself! This means taking
care of the order fulfillment, the shipping, and the
customer service - all on his own! He was reluctant to
delegate order fulfillment to a company that supplies such
services because he was afraid it would cost too much money.
Delegating this type of ongoing task to a service company
certainly will cost some money, but it's an investment in
the client's piece of mind and the company's future. When
the details of order fulfillment are taken care of, he is
free to focus on what he does best - business development.
The business then grows, more money comes in, and the cost
of the fulfillment company is more than made up for in
sales and growth.
Objection #2: Perfectionism
Another client is a single mom who is a partner at a
top-notch law firm. She works a lot of hours, and does her
best to spend quality time with her two teenagers. But she
was also spending a lot of time stressing - and I mean
stressing - about how clean her house was (or wasn't). She
was reluctant to delegate house cleaning to a professional
cleaning person or to her kids because she thought it would
take too much time to explain how she likes it all done.
This is perfectionism - she's not willing to let go of a
task and let someone run with it. This client felt that if
the house wasn't cleaned her way, it wouldn't be cleaned
right. In order for her to delegate this, she had to trust
in a professional cleaning service, and in her kids, and
just let go of the responsibility altogether.
As a result, this client has found that her relationship
with her kids has improved. They certainly did object when
she first delegated certain daily responsibilities to them,
but her stress level has decreased tremendously and that
has had a very positive effect on her relationship with her
kids.
Objection #3: Taking Care of Others
Another client is the president of a professional
organization and is in charge of a big annual event. As
the lead person on this event, she needs to delegate a lot
of work, or it simply won't get done! But she had a lot of
guilt about delegating projects without first "cleaning
them up." Instead of handing over a file and saying "Here
you go, this is what I need, please figure it out," she was
spinning her wheels trying to clean up the file and make
the project as simple as possible.
In this example, the client is not really delegating,
because she's too busy taking care of the people helping
her. It's very considerate, but doesn't move her project
forward. Politely delegating projects, chores, and tasks
is not mean, rude, or unreasonable - it's necessary,
especially in the position that this client was in.
Without delegation, nothing would get done.
In order to lower stress and ensure success, adults with
ADD should ask themselves on a regular basis "What would I
really love to delegate, and how can I go about delegating
it immediately?"
----------------------------------------------------
Jennifer Koretsky is the Founder of the ADD Management
Group, Inc. and the author of the new book Odd One Out: The
Maverick's Guide to Adult ADD. Jennifer and her team work
with ADD adults who are overwhelmed with everyday life in
order to help them simplify, focus, and succeed. For free
resources and information on adult ADD, visit
http://www.ADDmanagement.com . To learn more about Odd One
Out, visit http://www.odd-one-out.net .
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