Many cancer caregivers have full-time, or even part-time
jobs...and feel stressed and torn between their job and
caregiving. Here are some tips to help acknowledge and
reduce that stress.
Be Up Front With Your Employer
Be honest with both your supervisor and the human resources
department (if you have one) about your caregiving
situation. Don't apologize or offer excuses. Be ready to
discuss any changes they may note in your availability or
schedule. Be honest about the needs of your family, and
discuss why you may need to not take on any additional
responsibilities or even travel. Ask about the company's
policy for caregiver support (even if you don't need time
off now, it's good to know ahead of time). And be sure to
check out your state's Family Leave Act to see if you
qualify.
Offer Suggestions
Once your employer understands your situation, they'll be
much more likely to work with you. Come prepared to your
meeting with suggestions that will help you....for example
working from home a portion of the time, developing flex
time (coming in early or staying late on days you need
flexibility), or taking longer lunch hours to help your
loved one with appointments or follow up on outstanding
issues. Your employer may have additional options for you.
They often offer resources in terms of sick days, vacation
days, comp time, and in cases of crisis, your colleagues
may be allowed to donate accrued time to you. It's worth a
discussion!
Ask for Support
Don't be afraid to ask for help. Colleagures, friends,
family, and church groups are often eager to assist -- they
often just don't know how to help or what you need.
Ask someone to help you look into respite care so you have
support if you need it while at work to have time for
yourself. There are many community, local, and national
resources to support you in this. You can start with the
National Family Caregiver Association is an excellent place
to start. If you need to, you may be able to utilize The
Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA), a national policy that
guarantees covered employees 12 weeks of unpaid leave each
year to care for a seriously ill family member while
ensuring job security.
Self-Care
Caregivers often become depressed and depleted of energy.
In order to give your best, to yourself and others, you
must take time daily to take care physically, mentally, and
spiritually.
Physically: Eat healthy and well-balanced meals regularly.
Exercise every day, even if it's just taking a short walk.
Use relaxation or stress management techniques, such as
meditation, visualization, journaling and yoga. Schedule
time for this every day or it probably won't happen.
Mentally: Acknowledge your own feelings around the cancer
journey. Vent to family members, a counselor, or friends,
not coworkers. Stay actively involved with friends and
hobbies. Create a support network and/or join a support
group.
Spiritually: Take time, even as little as 15 minutes per
day, for prayer or meditation. Read or subscribe to
inspirational magazines, newsletters or books to keep
yourself inspired and uplifted. Consider seeking the
counsel of a minister in your community. Following these
tips will help you take care of your job, your loved one,
and yourself -- all of which are important.
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Jayne Hutchinson was immersed into a new world after her
husband was diagnosed with cancer. She found there was
little information and support available for spouses and
partners. She created the My Loved One Has Cancer web site
to fill that gap.This web site features comprehensive
resources and tools to make the cancer journey easier for
the spouse or partner of a loved one with cancer.
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