Your Knee-Jerk Reaction Can Cause Stress

Your Knee-Jerk Reaction Can Cause Stress
Don't live your life in De-Stress Default. "De-Stress
Default" is our normal, knee-jerk reaction when things go
wrong. When a child spills milk, our knee-jerk reaction is
to become angry. When the boss yells at us, our knee-jerk
reaction is to respond negatively or think negatively. When
something stressful happens, we tend to become more
stressed. Stress is contagious.

With our already hectic lifestyles, there are simple ways
to avoid the de-stress default trap. We don't have to allow
our stress thermostat to simmer or come to a boil when we
come into contact with stressful people or events. We can
respond positively.

Here are two simple steps to avoid the de-stress default
trap:

One: Breathe

Every time you encounter a stressful person or event, take
five deep breaths before you respond. Breathe deeply;
exhale slowly. Taking five deep breaths provides us time to
prepare a thoughtful response to replace a knee-jerk
reaction. Taking five deep breaths calms us and provides
our brains with oxygen to think clearly and creatively.

Be proactive. Take five deep breaths when you first wake
up, and take five deep breaths before you fall asleep. Take
five deep breaths before you answer a telephone call from a
stress-instigating family member or co-worker.

Two: Cultivate Your Emotional Intelligence Dozens of
studies find that negative emotions can be contagious, at
home or in the workplace. Negatives can be a chief
instigator of De- Stress Default.

Don't look at an unhappy or stressful event or person as a
negative, but as a positive in terms of the "emotional
intelligence" you can learn to use to stave off de-stress
default. Emotional intelligence defines your ability to
gauge and act on another person's emotional reactions.

If you recognize that your boss usually is in a bad mood on
Monday mornings, you have equipped yourself with the
emotional intelligence to pro-actively avoid meetings (or
better navigate your way through conversations that you
can't avoid) with that person during those time periods.

If your children are accident-prone (and most children are
accident-prone), use your emotional intelligence to accept
and anticipate that accidents will happen. You'll be less
inclined to become angry.

Instead, you can pro-actively plan to be a role model for
patience and a helpful teacher in showing how your children
can how to avoid accidents. You can also become a role
model for forgiveness.

If you tend to panic on deadline, use your emotional
intelligence about yourself to create more time to start
your projects well in advance of deadlines.

Use and cultivate your emotional intelligence. It can be a
powerful tool to help you avoid the De-Stress Default trap,
trim down your fast-paced lifestyle, and add some
reasonableness to your coping mechanisms.

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Ruth Klein is an award-winning business owner, best-selling
author and marketing and time management consultant whose
clients range from solo entrepreneurs to the Fortune 500.
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